28 September 2006

Non-Nicotine Quit Smoking

Instead of using nicotine based therapies such as nicotine gums, patches or inhalers, there are other alternatives to help you quit smoking without the use of nicotine. Because nicotine is addictive, you will eventually still have to quit those therapies.

If you have tried to quit smoking, you know how hard it can be, because nicotine is a very addictive drug, as addictive as heroin or cocaine for many. Quitting is hard, and usually people make 4 tries, or more, before finally being able to quit. Quitting takes hard work and a lot of effort, but you can quit smoking.

There are many and various ways that people can use to quit smoking. Hundred of thousands maybe millions of people have succeeded in quitting the cigarettes. However, not all methods would be suitable for everyone. But there is only one way which can truly beat the cigarette habit, and that is to simply stop smoking. It is a wonderful concept, because it is so simple in statement, and yet many people find it incredibly difficult to successfully execute.

The most important aspect to quit smoking is to have willpower, determination and the genuine desire to stop for good. However, you will never know how much willpower you really have unless cravings and urge strikes. Willpower is derived from your will to quit smoking. Look for a strong intention to quit, and you will have the willpower automatically.

Nicotine patches, nicotine gum, herbal cigarettes and the like are all ineffective ways to quit cigarette smoking. Smoking is primarily a psychological addiction, and these remedies don't cure the psychological bond you have with cigarettes - they just strengthen it. It is important to break the psychological addiction to cigarettes, but if you are intent on quitting the cigarette habit, ensure you don't replace one dependency with another one.

Quitting smoking may be one of the hardest things to do, and while there are few rehab treatment programs specifically designed for smokers, there are many programs, tips, and methods that are able to help.

27 September 2006

Just quit smoking

What if you could make just one change to improve your health? The choice is plain - if you're a smoker, quit. That's easier said than done; though learn how you are able to achieve success. Check out products that can make it easier, as well as alternative approaches like meditation or hypnotism. Discover the dangers of secondhand smoke and how to protect your family and especially kids. And you should know that your body could recover fast after you do stop smoking.

Set a quit date. Pick a date within the next two weeks. If you smoke at work, quit on the weekend or on your day off. Keep yourself busy doing something useful and pleasant. Ride out your cravings; they will pass. Cut back on alcohol because it may intensify nicotine cravings. Avoid places where smoking is allowed and if your friends are smokers, ask them to join you in quitting permanently or to puff when you are not around. Ask people to bear with you if your mood changes. Ask your health provider for help with your quitting smoking because nicotine is very addictive and you need all help and support you can get. Get support from people, whether your family members or in a support group. There are many helpful quit smoking resources available online and by phone.

Quit now while you can because the older you get, the harder it is to quit. Get free of a stinky, nasty habit and get better skin color, increased energy, normal breath. Feel yourself in control instead of being controlled by cigarettes. Be able to taste food again. Get a chance to live longer. Just quit smoking.

26 September 2006

From developed to developing countries

Tobacco is one of the rare lethal products legally and widely traded at the global level. Tobacco products have a transnational dimension when it comes to smuggling, global advertising and promotion, or international cooperation on information sharing. The tobacco epidemic has thus become globalized, and its globalization restricts the capacity of countries to regulate tobacco through domestic legislation alone.

Tobacco use has also a development dimension. In all the countries where data are available, tobacco use has been shown to be very closely related to poverty. Tobacco consumption is moving from developed to developing countries. Tobacco use also worsens the poverty of individuals and countries. At the individual and household levels, money spent on tobacco has a very high opportunity cost. For the poor, money spent on tobacco is money not spent on basic necessities, such as food, shelter, education and health care. Poor tobacco consumers also tend to be more at risk of falling sick, which can exacerbate a household's financial situation.

At the national level, countries suffer huge economic losses owing to high health care costs, as well as lost productivity caused by tobacco-related illnesses and premature deaths. Most countries are net importers of tobacco products and lose millions of dollars a year in precious foreign exchange from these imports. Tobacco also degrades their natural environment. Based on the facts set out above, tobacco is clearly linked with disease, poverty, hunger and gender issues.

25 September 2006

Anger raise risk of heart disease

Everyone gets angry from time to time. It's a normal human response to unfair treatment and other injustices. But normal anger is one thing, excessive hostility quite another. Excessive anger can bring on heart disease, at least in men. High-hostility men were 1.6 times more likely to die from heart disease than their more placid peers.

How does hostility harm the heart? Like other forms of stress, anger triggers a surge in adrenaline. This so-called stress hormone boosts the blood pressure and pulse rate. That increases the heart's workload and multiplies its need for oxygen. Adrenaline can also trigger abnormal heart rhythms. It also stimulates the formation of blood clots, which can block clogged arteries. All of these factors raise the likelihood of a heart attack.

Try to identify the things that bother you most and do your best to change them. Learn to recognize the warning signs of building tension, such as a racing pulse, fast breathing or a jumpy, restless feeling. When you recognize these signals, take steps to relieve the tension before it builds to the boiling point. Often something as simple as a brief walk or a snack can cool things down nicely. Build strong relationships and talk out your feelings instead of bottling them up inside. If it's difficult for you to talk aloud, try writing a letter. Establish priorities; set realistic expectations and pace yourself, building in time to relax. Get enough sleep. Don't try to calm yourself with nicotine, alcohol, or drugs. Think positively and make time for activities that are stimulating and enjoyable.

Even without professional help, you can benefit from stress-reducing techniques. Consider learning how to meditate. You can also use behavioral techniques to help stay calm. Here are some ways to practice during your daily life so you'll be able to keep your cool in times of stress:

- Drive your car in the slow right-hand lane.

- When you approach a toll plaza, join the longest line, even if you have the exact change.

- Use your car horn only to prevent car accidents, not to vent frustration.

- Eat slowly.

- Talk slowly; try not to interrupt others.

- Don't put in the last word in an argument, even if you think you're right.

- Don't raise your voice in anger.

- Don't use expletives; substitute less hostile phrases like "darn" or "rats."

- Don't permit outbursts of anger; instead wait for a few moments, take a few deep breaths, and express yourself calmly.

- Try not to grimace or clench your teeth; practice smiling.

22 September 2006

Save your teeth

They want women to think smoking is going this way:
Quit Smoking Virginia Slims
This is how it looks like in reality:
Quit Smoking - Save Your Teeth

Gum disease is usually painless, but can lead to loss of teeth - over one year. Statistics show that smokers are still up to six times more likely to develop gum disease than non-smokers, because the detrimental effect the habit has on their body’s immune system makes them less well-equipped to fight back. It is very important to look after your teeth, because losing them will have a huge influence on your life. Not only will this affect your appearance, it can also impact on your confidence, lifestyle, and so much more.

For example, losing teeth could prevent you from eating a healthy diet. You are less likely to chose to eat something like an apple if your teeth are loose, because it would be difficult to bite and chew it. Smokers who give up are much less likely to lose their teeth prematurely than those who do not kick the habit.

20 September 2006

But I've always been a smoker!

Many smokers tend to think of it that way. But, no, you have not always been a smoker. You were born as non-smoker. There was a time in your life, before you began smoking, when you didn't even think about lighting up. Please, give yourself the opportunity to be anything else. Many people view the future through their past, but you can take yourself from wherever you are right now to where you want to be.

As you think so you become. Instead of thinking about smoking or not smoking or instead of focusing on any problem or bad habit, why not turn your attention to your inner strength? If you cannot do it without assistance, then hypnosis and meditation are able to help you. Your desire to smoke or doing anything harmful to yourself will disappear! Thousand of people have done it and have gotten these results.

See yourself ten years from now as a smoker. Notice how your skin is yellowish, your breathing more difficult, your bank account is less impressive, thanks to all the money you've blown on cigarettes. Is that what you want to look forward to? Think about it. You are able to be smoke-free. It happened with millions ex-smokers. And you are able to stop smoking too.

19 September 2006

Game is over already for many smokers

Women smoke to be as elegant and classy as Audrey Hepburn in Breakfast at Tiffany’s. Men smoke to be wild and mysterious like Brad Pitt in Fight Club. During many years and still today there was kind of a social conditioning for smoking. Something everyone should do, if they ever wanted to be included in the "winners" side at the end of the game. Regretfully, the game is over already for many smokers that had to suffer the most common consequence of smoking, i.e., an early death.

According to the World Health Organization, tobacco use is the leading preventable cause of death, and that the death toll caused by tobacco-related products is at nearly five million people a year. By the year 2020, the number of deaths will double to ten million a year if the current smoking patterns continue. Statistics indicate that despite a decline in the number of adults who smoke, more of children under the age of 18 start smoking each day.

When trying to quit smoking you will surely have irritability, anxiety, depression, cravings and many other symptoms, arising due to the addiction to nicotine. Nicotine meets both the psychological and physiological characteristics of what we call an addiction. And yes, no one denies it; quitting cigarette smoking can be a real nightmare for many people. Millions of people worldwide try to break the nicotine habit, but only 10 percent of them succeed. Will you succeed?

18 September 2006

Gambling addiction

Everyone addicted to coffee or just to Coca-Cola. And countless are addicted to alcohol, anti depressants, cocaine, drugs, food, gambling, heroin, internet, masturbation, narcotics, pornography, religion, sex, smoking, video, or work; just a little list of addictions in alphabetical order. It seems that anything can become an addiction.

For some gambling is an extremely powerful addiction that is hard to escape. Gamblers get a high from the adrenalin produced by their bodies while in action. Adrenalin addiction is a progressive addiction where exciting events become usual and greater excitement must be reached to produce the same high. So, the larger the risk, the greater the amount of adrenalin. Those with gambling problems are now facing even more temptations: there has been an upgrowth in gambling industry. And because the increase has exposed more people to gambling, some experts believe it has also led to a rise in the number of addicts.

Gambling addiction is more than a personal financial problem. Experts consider it a public health issue, like drug, and alcohol addiction, because it affects jobs, families and mental health. Addicted gamblers are more inclined to domestic abuse and suicide, they said. People become so involved with it they lose themselves and lose being responsible in their lives. It has a higher degree of suicide than any other addiction. The degree of financial devastation is so much greater than any other addiction or any other mental health issue.

17 September 2006

Philip Morris

Philip Morris states inside their official website: "Our goal is to be the most responsible, effective and respected developer, manufacturer and marketer of consumer products, especially products intended for adults". On the other page under the title – "Addiction", you are able to read: "Philip Morris USA agrees with the overwhelming medical and scientific consensus that cigarette smoking is addictive. It can be very difficult to quit smoking, but this should not deter smokers who want to quit from trying to do so." Also, smokers should know that the level of nicotine, the most addictive ingredient in tobacco the industry boosted 10 percent between 1998 and 2004, just to set the hook a little deeper.

Philip Morris states that their Youth Smoking Prevention department focuses on three research-based initiatives: parent communications, grant programs and youth access prevention. However, it seems that Philip Morris PR campaigns aren't designed to stop youth smoking, but to put the brakes on tax increases, further restrictions on advertising, and other successful anti-smoking efforts... And so, Philip Morris is free to pass out promotional materials at amusement parks, schools, and video arcades, playing the fool with teenagers. A Philip Morris 25 years old marketing slogan: "Today's teenager is tomorrow's potential regular customer", the nowadays message is also clear, but insidious: Teenage smoking is the product of unsuccessful parenting and cigarettes accessibility to youth, not the industry's successful marketing and the addictive nature of nicotine.

Is Philip Morris your or your child friend? You shouldn't think so.

15 September 2006

Do it for your penis

Many men are now impotent because they smokedDid you know that there's a valve in your penis that traps the blood inside so you can get an erection? That every time you smoke, this valve is damaged? That if you don't quit now, it might stop working altogether? You do know. Every cigarette you smoke causes fatty deposits that restrict the flow of blood to your penis. Less blood means less of an erection, and if you keep on smoking, things will only get worse. Does smoking make you hard? Not if it means you can't get it up.

Do you find smoking relaxing? Many men are now impotent because they smoked. It damages the blood vessels in your penis. Often, you won't even notice any of the damage until it's far too late. Worrying, isn't it. Still fancy a cigarette? If you won't give up smoking for your lungs, heart or throat, maybe you'll do it for your penis.

14 September 2006

It's better to joke than smoke

Hazardous to your health

Fifteen days ago, I read that smoking can kill you. The next day, I stopped smoking.

Twelve days ago, I read that too much red meat can kill you. The next day, I stopped eating red meat.

Eight days ago, I read that drinking can kill you. The next day, I stopped drinking.

Yesterday, I read that having sex can kill you. This morning, I stopped reading.

13 September 2006

Quitting smoking saves money

There is a little recognized hole in the quitter's arsenal of strategies, which can sometimes defeat what is otherwise an excellent stop smoking plan. You need to be aware of the role of money in your smoking behavior if you want to leave it behind successfully.

A pack-a-day smoker, can expect to save a lot of money when quit. It appears that the price of cigarettes will continue to rise in coming years, as will the financial rewards of quitting. Logic says that when you stop smoking you will be financially much better off each year. Most likely you even not be able to get a salary raise that good. And you won't be paying any more tax on it than you are now!

Start a piggy bank with the money you save by not buying cigarettes. It is a way of giving yourself something - and we all like to receive a gift. And you have to fill it up every day, for as long as you have been smoking. It is money. If the money you save disappears into the black hole of household needs, you risk feeling missing cigarettes!

To improve your chances, plan to continue spending (or putting by) the same amount of money on yourself for at least a month from your stop date. Spend it on something tangible and pleasurable for yourself, so that when you see it and enjoy it you can acknowledge that this is what you are choosing to give yourself now.

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12 September 2006

Smoking aphorisms and quotes

- The best cigarette is an unlit one.

- Warning! Alcohol will turn you into the same asshole your father was.
" George Carlin"

- The body needs tobacco but the soul booze.

- I kissed my first girl and smoked my first cigarette on the same day. I haven't had time for tobacco since.
" Arturo Toscanini"

- "Is it true that you smoke eight to ten cigars a day?"
- "That's true."
- "Is it true that you drink five martinis a day?"
- "That's true."
- "Is it true that you still surround yourself with beautiful young women?"
- "That's true."
- "What does your doctor say about all of this?"
- "My doctor is dead."
" George Burns"

- What a weird thing smoking is and I can't stop it. I feel cosy, have a sense of well-being when I'm smoking, poisoning myself, killing myself slowly. Not so slowly maybe. I have all kinds of pains I don't want to know about and I know that's what they're from. But when I don't smoke I scarcely feel as if I'm living. I don't feel as if I'm living unless I'm killing myself.
" Russell Hoban"

- A smoking section in a restaurant is like a peeing section in a pool.

- I have made it a rule never to smoke more than one cigar at a time.
" Mark Twain"

- And a woman is only a woman, but a good cigar is a smoke.
" Rudyard Kipling"

- Cigarettes are as American as emphysema and apple pie.
" Mark Russell"

- I believe in cigarettes. I think we're overpopulated.
" Christopher Buckley"

- I phoned my dad to tell him I had stopped smoking. He called me a quitter.
" Steven Pearl"

- It has always been my rule never to smoke when asleep, and never to refrain when awake.
" Mark Twain"

- Much smoking kills live men and cures dead swine.
" George D. Prentice"

- Thank heaven, I have given up smoking again!...God! I feel fit. Homicidal, but fit. A different man. Irritable, moody, depressed, rude, nervy, perhaps; but the lungs are fine.
" A. P. Herbert"

- They threaten me with lung cancer, and still I smoke and smoke. If they'd only threaten me with hard work, I might stop.
" Mignon McLaughlin"

- To cease smoking is the easiest thing I ever did; I ought to know because I've done it a thousand times.
" Mark Twain"

10 September 2006

Addiction feeds the industry

It is not surprising that the nicotine content in the most popular cigarettes among young people and minorities has increased sharply - 10 percent - from 1998 to 2004. The more nicotine cigarettes contain, the greater the potential that the product will be more addictive and the addiction will be quicker. An addiction to nicotine increases the activity of dopamine, a chemical in the brain that elicits pleasurable sensations, which when removed, may leave a smoker agitated and depressed. Persons who start smoking as adolescents develop a greater density of nicotine receptor sites in the brain; they become heavier smokers in adulthood, which feeds the industry. The industry knows, that if it can get a smoker addicted, then it has a user pretty much for life.

Adolescents are the perfect group for the industry's intentions because around age 11 the adolescent brain undergoes major reorganization associated with social behavior and impulse control. Adolescents vastly underestimate the addictive nature of nicotine. Most believe they will quit in five years. The decision to quit smoking is a brave and daring one to make. Nevertheless, 70 percent of smokers worldwide do want to drop the habit, but nearly 75 percent are still smoking five or six years later.It is not reasonable to allow the tobacco industry to regulate itself. It is time for health professionals, researchers and government officials to more aggressively regulate the industry.

Smoking and dating for smokers

It was discovered that people who advertise on lonely-heart websites are more likely to smoke than those who don't. Also special websites for dating where smoking is accepted exists. Smokers are able to find single adults whose common desire is to date others whose preference is to be in a relationship with sexy smokers.

You are not going to be surprised that pictures (inside dating websites) getting the greatest number of hits are pictures of non-smokers. People, who click on photographs of advertisers, do not know the person's smoking status at the time, but the percentage of smokers was far lower among the 100 most popular photographs. Anyway smoking is not attractive and it is a turn-off for singles.

In addition, link between smoking and a poor sex life was found. Everyone knows that smoking is bad for health, but the impact of smoking on impotence and erectile dysfunction, and also the effects of smoking on appearance, can be a stronger motivation to give up and stay quit.

08 September 2006

The Tobacco Conspiracy

Billions of dollars are at stake. Millions of deaths result. Top corporate executives sit around the boardroom and discuss ways to improve their market share. Their success depends on keeping you smoking and getting people that don’t smoke to start. It’ s all about the billions.

The tobacco companies have very deep pockets. They have spent billions of dollars in advertising over the years and they know how to keep their customers. They want you to die a smoker. Their bottom line depends on it. And you will if you do not quit.

What if I told you that stopping smoking was easy? That smoking is a body and mind addiction. Yes, body AND mind!

I don’t know anyone that actually picks up a cigarette and goes, “ mmmmm, tastes great!” Do you? Of course not. Your body rejects it. It coughs, hacks, spits, and does everything that it can to tell you this is bad stuff. You started because your mind was thinking how cool you will be, how much older it will make you look and your body is obeyed. Now you are addicted.

Everyone starts this way. EVERYONE. You had to use your mind to convince your body or you would reject it.

I find it fascinating that almost all methods of quitting smoking do not take into consideration the mind. There are pills and patches and inhalers and gums. All these programs have a very low success rate.

Doesn’t it make sense to use the very part of you that started the whole thing - Your mind?? Or course it does.

Everyone starts to smoke for some sort of motivating reason. If I gave you a piece of food that was stinky, burned your throat and made you cough and gag, how many pieces would you eat? I don’t think very many. See, it would be unnatural for you to want more.

Smoking is not natural or everyone would be smoking. You cannot grow a cigarette tree in your backyard or a cigarette plant in your garden. They are not natural. Tobacco may be natural but cigarettes are far more than tobacco with an estimated 4000 ingredients added! The list is highly guarded and protected by law as a trade secret. Imagine that. It’s the public’s health and it’s a trade secret. Something isn’t right.

But one thing that is right is the decision to quit smoking. Quitting smoking is the one thing that will immediately improve your life and the life of those around you. When a person realizes that quitting IS a Body and Mind process it makes the process much easier.

by Rick Saruna

Anti-smoking spots on DVDs

Hoping to reduce teen smoking, attorneys general from more than 35 US states offered movie studios free use of three public service announcements to include on DVDs and videos. They urge movie makers to do the right thing and include these powerful and persuasive anti-smoking ads on all DVDs and videos that depict tobacco use. Studios referred calls to the Motion Picture Association of America.

MPAA spokeswoman Kori Bernards said it was too early to comment on whether studios would accept the offer to use the PSAs. We will formally respond to them in a timely manner and look forward to future discussions with them," Bernards said. She added that the entertainment industry recognizes smoking is a serious health problem, and the MPAA is working with the Harvard School of Public Health on anti-smoking initiatives. Bernards declined to elaborate.

The attorneys general blame films that show smoking for influencing hundreds of thousands of U.S. adolescents to begin lighting up every year. 38 of every 100 youths who tried smoking did so because of their exposure to smoking in movies. The attorneys general said 73 percent of all youth-rated movies show tobacco use.

"This may not be an offer they can't refuse, but it should be an offer studio executives will be happy to accept," California Attorney General Bill Lockyer said of the PSAs being offered. The three public service announcements are entitled "Body Bags," "1200" and "Shards O Glass." The anti-smoking messages were created by the American Legacy Foundation, which runs national advertisements designed to prevent teens from smoking.

06 September 2006

There is no "light" nicotine addiction

Why do smokers keep puffing away at a habit they know can kill them and those around them?

Here is a clue: Studies consistently show that about three-quarters of smokers want to quit. Many have tried repeatedly. But the habit wins. That is because it's not a habit, it is an addiction.

After decades of denial, even tobacco industry executives mostly admit that the nicotine in cigarettes is addictive. Despite the abundance of cigarettes now labeled "light" and "ultra-light", the amount of nicotine being inhaled by smokers has increased significantly: an average of 10 percent, some higher than 20 percent, from 1998 to 2004. The nicotine levels in some brands went up even more, especially those favored by young smokers.

There were no significant differences in nicotine level among "full flavor", "mild", "light", or "ultra light" cigarettes. Smokers who switch to "lower yield" cigarettes don't lower their nicotine consumption. Tobacco companies have designed their cigarettes to precisely control nicotine delivery levels and provide doses of nicotine sufficient to create and sustain addiction.

05 September 2006

Help your children

You should make tobacco prevention a priority in the life of your child. While many may think of tobacco use as a simple ceremony of passage, it is the first step in a chain of decisions that can negatively affect your child's life, as well as the livelihood of your entire family. More than a third of all kids who ever try smoking a cigarette become regular, daily smokers before leaving high school. In fact, the addiction rate for smoking (the percentage of experimenters who ultimately become habitual users) is higher than the addiction rates for marijuana, alcohol or cocaine.

As a parent, there are a number of things you can do to help your children avoid tobacco use:

- Maintain a smoke-free home. A smoke-free home makes children less likely to smoke, even if their parents do. There are no safe levels of tobacco exposure. Also most smoking parents want the best health outcomes for the children, but if they are smoking at home it becomes a case of, "Do as I say, not as I do". Children of smokers face elevated risk for asthma and bronchitis, a risk that often stays with them even after they leave the smoking environment.

- Ask your children's principal, teachers and coaches to ban smoking on all public school campuses and at school-sponsored events.

- If you smoke, quit! Share your struggles with your child. Research shows that children who have a parent who smokes are more likely to smoke and to be heavier smokers at young ages. Also those children have worse behavior problems than those from non-smoking homes. It is very important for smoking parents to realize that it is not just their health, that they must pay attention to the health of their children.

- Do not portray smoking as an adult activity. Children want to be grown up, and are attracted to activities that make them feel independent and mature. Telling children that smoking is an activity that should wait until adulthood sends a bad message that it is OK to smoke.

04 September 2006

Smoking-out Tom and Jerry

When Tom comes at Jerry with a knife, no one bats an eye. When he tries to put him through an egg slicer, everyone chuckles. But when the popular cartoon character takes a drag on a cigarette, that is going too far.

Boomerang, the British children's cartoon channel, said it would cut scenes from two Tom and Jerry episodes. In Texas Tom, Tom tries to draw a female cat's attention by rolling a cigarette, lighting it and smoking it using just one hand. In Tennis Chumps, Tom's rival in a match is shown puffing on a big cigar. It is possible that smoking scenes could also be cut from Tom and Jerry and other cartoons shown in the United States also.

There is a code that broadcasters must adhere to, and the portrayal of various things such as smoking must be editorially justified, smoking must not be featured in children's programming unless there is strong editorial justification, and it must not be condoned, encouraged or glamorized.

02 September 2006

Asthma among children

Maternal smoking can trigger childhood asthma and that it contributes to the development of asthma in adults. With the prevalence of asthma having increased by about 40 to 50 per cent over the past decade in the world, about 10 per cent of the children globally are asthmatic. A child suffering from asthma is susceptible to frequent colds, nocturnal cough, a feeling of breathlessness on exercising, tightness in the chest and wheezing.

A household that has an asthmatic child should avoid carpets, stuffed toys, woolen blankets and pets. Smoking cigarettes and exposure to smoke also worsens the condition. Medications designed to treat asthma, high blood pressure, and depression can lose their effectiveness in combination with nicotine.

Parents' smoking status is one of the most important environmental factors in the health of the child. Many children die from tobacco exposure, and children with household smokers miss an average of six extra school days a year. Children whose parents smoke are more likely to have wheezing, asthma, bronchitis, sudden infant death syndrome, middle-ear disease and other cognitive and behavioral problems.

01 September 2006

If your girlfriend starts smoking

girlfriend starts smoking

- What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?
- Slow down and use a lubricant... yeah, but not an oil based one - she may catch fire...

Some more this style jokes:

- He found a better job, got a new gf. All because he stopped smoking.
- I need to start smoking, so then I can quit and all sorta good shit will happen to me...

- So... how long have you stopped smoking for?
- Let me see... about 1 hour 30 min...